"Nine" or "The Summer of Nine" or "The Summer of Being Nine"
( Fresh write--with a half dozen edits this monring--fromour weekend with cousins in MN . Which title works best? The simple "Nine" doesn't give it all away, but I felt like it needed more. A few lines still bother me -- looking for something more original that "loudness and laughter" . Do I need the line "On the far edge of this precious glass?" The last line--came to me on my bike ride this morning--but I don't know if someone else has used that--maybe I read it somewhere ??? -and it stuck in my subconscious--so then, can I use it? Did I really think that up myself?)
Summer has barely unfurled
when the 4th of July comes roaring by,
a giggle of girls gusts into the lake
finally, Minnesota warm.
Arms arc and splay airward
explode in aqua fireworks,
rainbows of rain fall back on them
loudness and laughter
cousins tubing and tumbling over each other
and first tries at water skiing
under a traveling sun.
As light begins to tire
one of you quietly dives
into the metallic mirror,
sun radiating red,
on the far edge of this precious glass,
you, diving, emerging,
over and over
determined to find yourself
in the blush of this
The sun ripe with stars.
(And here's a little Haiku--for fun" I wrote this on my bike ride, too..lol)
Grown men with wicked
short fuses on the 4th of July
ejaculating into the sky.